Band-aids don’t heal bullet holes

Yeah I am pretty sure Taylor swift summed up my last few months with that one sentence.  I spent a great deal of my life band-aiding my issues.  With food, with alcohol,  cigarettes, drugs, pretty much anything i could to temporarily stop the bleeding. But like most wounds, they just couldn’t heal properly because they didn’t have time.  Just when i thought they stood a chance, the pain would start, the itching,  the sting, and before i knew it, the wound would find a way to open once again.  The cycle would continue.

This past year I have learned a great deal about those  wounds.  I learned that no matter how much i wanted them to heal, there are some wounds that will only heal when treated and left alone.

One cannot heal when they are surrounded by poison.  So I walked away.  I said good bye.  The hardest thing I have done thus far. Because it was done for my own survival.  For me.  Only me.

I wish I could say my memories of you will be filled with warmness. I wish I could say that we could get through this and see what the years will bring.  But I know all to well the pain of the bullets, and its time to put the band aids away and heal for good. I wish you  no ill will.  I know all too well that you too must have had your fair share of bullet wounds.

My only wish  for you is simple.

Wherever you are, I hope you too, can make peace with your own broken pieces.




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